Hello and welcome to the June edition of the Carnival of Video Game Bloggers! Due to technical trouble, this edition isn’t quite as eloquent as usual. You can rest assured that things will be back to normal next month, so don’t stop submitting those articles!

Let’s kick things off with an entry from the one and only David Herbert. Sigh.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Trainer Mechanic Will Appear In Tiger Woods PGA Tour 09 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

In case you’re interested, there are another 75 (Seventy Five) entries from David Herbert. I certainly hope I don’t forget to include them…

Aury Glenz presents This Game Sucks: GTA IV Edition posted at Trash Flavored Trash.

Jaklar presents Age of Conan Launch Impressions - Good News, Bad News posted at InfoAddict.

96well presents [game] Mechanical turk for Science posted at Reportergene.

Redskyy presents Guitar Hero Increases the PR Pressure posted at media spec.

Harrison presents Top 10 Video Games of All Time posted at Watsonreview’s Weblog, saying, “Some of these games on this list might just surprise you”

old-wizard presents Top 5 Girls From Nintendo posted at Old-Wizard.com.

old-wizard presents Ask DestructoMaximo: May 29th, 2008 posted at Old-Wizard.com.

Anthony De Franco presents The 3rd String Safety: Nearly Perfect: A Review of Devil May Cry 4… posted at The 3rd String Safety, saying, “We are a blog focused on the interests of young men, including sports, MMA, television, and of course Video Games. We cover the hype and releases of many games in addition to reviews of any games we play.”

Aonxe presents Warhammer Online Guild System Heads Up posted at Aonxe, saying, “An interesting, in-depth article about the new game Warhammer Online: Age of Reckoning and how their new revolutionary “living guild” system works.”

Fiona King presents Virtual Learning: 25 Best Sims and Games For the Classroom posted at College@Home.

JakeT presents Episode 1 “Roll it Gal” posted at Jak in the Box.

Meg presents Simpson’s Paradox » Blog Archive » Priorities posted at Simpson’s Paradox.

Matthew Boyd presents Sailing away with “Harpooned.” posted at Kwanzoo, saying, “Harpooned - A fine example of video games as rhetoric.”

Eclipse presents The Purpose of Video Game Reviews posted at Gaming My Way.

That’s it for June edition! Once the “Get your free PS3″ spam was sifted out, there were some fasnicating reads, so a big thank-you to all who sent something in. And sorry for not including all your entries David, but 75 is a little excessive!

Remember, anyone is welcome to join the carnival, so get typing and submit your blog article to the next edition of carnival of video game bloggers using the carnival submission form.

Past posts and future hosts can be found on the blog carnival index page.

Technorati tags: carnival of video game bloggers, blog carnival.

I have no idea what the horses pulling this Carnival eat, but they certainly do get a spurt on. It hardly seems five minutes since I channelled David Herbert, yet here we are with yet more of the very finest articles the world of videogames has to offer. So scrub up and let’s dive into the guts of the games world.

First up it’s Eclipse with an insightful post on the oft-overlooked Music of Gaming. I agree that these days we’re seeing more focus on graphics, but I do think we’re seeing much more focus put into creating fantastic, high-quality audio - Bioshock certainly springs to mind, as does Super Mario Galaxy. More music like that, please!

Controversy-courting magician Old Wizard is up next. Now, I’m strongly tempted not to include his submission this month, but everyone’s entitled to their opinion, so here is Old Wizard’s Top 5 Worst Gaming Consoles of All Time. I normally enjoy your posts, but this time you have done my family a great disrespect.

Next up, FitBuff posts about the American release of Wii Fit, in Nintendo Wii Fit Release Date (Preorder Here Now!)”. I’ve had WiiFit for a few weeks now and it is every bit as fun as you can imagine, and I tend to finish my workouts with a distinct sweat on and muscle pains, although the same can be said about my legendary multiplayer Bomberman sessions.

With GTA IV still in everyone’s machines, Ashok is taking a look at the old games violence debate, but with a refreshingly sensible approach. Make sure you read the article Rethink.: The Purported Video Games and Violence Link is A Load of Nonsense, particularly for the blood-curdling link to orange juice.

A new blogger has entered the Carnival! Welcome to Creep Colony, who runs “The #1 StarCraft & Starcraft 2 tips/tricks source, providing the latest news, downloads, maps, bots, strategies & cheats.” This is surely a site that’s going to go from strength to strength as Blizzard release more news, so make sure to head over to Starcraft II Information immediately!

Old-wizard again. Top 10 Hardest Games. Still not forgiven.

A double whammy now from Amanda Harris, who posts a thought-provoking article about Internet safety before relaxing you again with some online Backgammon. You could do it the other way of course but I wouldn’t like to predict the effects. Allowing Your Children to Go Online with Video Games? and Relax with Some Online Backgammon are both posts at eFamilyBlogger. Thanks, Amanda!

Lots of new bloggers this month! The next submission speaks for itself, so it’s over to you, Blue Sunshine! “GTA4 is already under fire from one columnist, claiming that it deserves an “X rating” (not AO mind you). However, his willingness to jump to conclusions is unjustified due to the fact that he hasn’t even played the game. Also a humorous look at others who may complain about the game in the future.” I couldn’t have put it better myself. Grand Theft Auto 4 Already Causing Controversy is a corker.

Old Wizard. Top 5 Worst Video Game Related Websites of All Time. So much anger.

Alvaro Fernandez is here! I love you Alvaro. You make me feel enlightened yet humble at the same time. Exercise Your Brain in the Cognitive Age is a post about “Key questions on Brain Training that politicians, health policy makers, business leaders, educators and consumers should pay attention to.”

Now we have doublehack with Shadowbox 360 Review: Façade posted at DOUBLEHACK?!, saying, “Facade is a game featuring a Natural Language Processor, meaning it attempts to understand your normal speech. It’s impressive, but basically a novelty.” An interesting specimen to tackle doublehack - I approve!

My early favourite Eclipse rounds out this month’s Carnival with a post about my very most beloved Sonic the Hedgehog, with The Revival of Sonic the Hedgehog. Sonic Unleashed is still looking amazing to me and I’m sure it’ll do brilliantly, and hopefully you all agree.

Thank you very much to everybody who submitted to this month’s Carnival - it was brilliant to see so many people contributing well-written and interesting articles on such a diverse range of topics. Don’t forget to submit for next month’s Carnival on the Carnival homepage, and come back next month for even more Carnival of Video Game Bloggers!

Oh, and we also have these from David Herbert…

See you next month!

David Herbert presents Games-News-Mafia 2 Details Emerged posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-World In Conflict: Soviet Assault posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Valhalla Knights 2 Japanese Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-News-1985 Switches Engines posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-New LittleBigPlanet Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-One Winged Angel posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Columns-Gears of War 2 Multiplayer Wishes posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-EPIC HALO 3 BETRAYAL posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-NEW Lara Croft in UNDERWORLD posted at pariahs-guild.com

David Herbert presents Games-News-Wii Fit Price Tag Revealed posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Meet The Scout posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Brothers In Arms: HH-To Hell and Back Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Mods-TS2 Studios Gaming Machinima Mod For Sims 2 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Halo 3 Roller Coaster posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-New TF2 Map And New Medic Weapons! posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Age of Conan Subscription Rate Revealed posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Sims Sells 100 Million Copies posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-No Scope Was Involved posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Mortal Kobat on iPhone/iPod Touch posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-NEVER B4 DONE ON HALO! Avalanche- Plasma Grenade Musical posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Earthworm Jim 4 Is Announced posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Columns-Games of The Summer 2008: Part 1 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Bret Favre Will Be On Madden 2009 Cover posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Wii on a HUGE T.V. posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Reviews-Infidelitas posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Nintendo Gives Explanation On Wii Shortage In North America posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Metal Gear Online Beta ?Team DM? posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Boom Blox Is Going Multi-Console posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Bionic Commando Rearmed ?Grenade? posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Interviews-1985 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-EA Is Working On?A Monopoly Video Game?! posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Siren:New Translation posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Columns-WTF Moments In Video Games posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Portal Will Not Be Released For XBLA posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Homeland Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Bourne Conspiracy Demo Is On X-Box Live posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-You got Served - Gman style posted at pariahs-guild.com

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Interviews-Halo: Covenant at War posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Map Of The Week-Portal: The Flash Version Mappack posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-For The Last Time! No Blue Ray For The X-Box 360! posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-New Killzone 2 Trailer Good Quality posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-OMG-God Of War 2 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Gonintendo Accidently Found Wiiware Hacking Video posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Brawl Taunts (A Cartoon Parody) posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Columns-Pariah?s Guild Favorite Machinima Series posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Happy 16th Birthday Wolfenstein 3-D posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Videos-Renegade X Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-X-Box 360 Version Of GTA 4 Sold More In The UK posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Molotov Alva $3,500 Contest Machinima Promo posted at pariahs-guild.com.

Well, it’s a start.

A very warm welcome to one and all! Congratulations on finding your way to the world’s only blog carnival celebrating the work of David Herbert. Without any further delay, let’s David!

Damon presents A Whole Bunch of PS3 Bullshit from CNet posted at The Deathbox: Issue #1, saying, “An interesting reply to a very uninformed CNet article”. The first two letters of Damon’s name are the same as David Herbert’s, which is why he eases us in this month.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Free Games-Crayon Physics posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Game-Videos-Guitar Hero On Tour posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-100 Ways To Die In GMOD posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-New DBZ Burst Limit Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Game-Videos-Viking Battle For Asgard: War Is Hell Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Map Of The Week-Convoy V2 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Game-Videos-Battlefield Bad Company Tactical Destruction Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-A Few Good G-Men posted at pariahs-guild.com.

Stephanie presents Moneymaking | ZRaids.com posted at ZRaids.com, saying, “World of Warcraft informational blog for beginners seeking to farm gold for raids and equipment.” I don’t play World of Warcraft, but perhaps I should. If only David Herbert would give me a sign, one way or the other.

Jigsaw hc presents Battlefield: Bad Company Beta Impressions posted at Jigsaw hc’s Rants & Reviews. Cool, cheers Jigsaw. If you’re up there David Herbert, please bestow blessings on Jigsaw, for he doth honour you every month.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse - Garry’s Mod Wallpapers - Big Daddy posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Starfox: Air Strike posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-The Legend of Lego Zelda posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Mods-Best WOW Add-ons posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Free Halo 3 Heroic Map Pack Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Amazing Nintendo Facts posted at pariahs-guild.com.

Alvaro Fernandez presents Sleep, Tetris, Memory and the Brain posted at SharpBrains, saying, “Do games ever appear on your dreams?”. I can’t take the piss out of Alvaro Fernandez - he’s a giant among ants in the world of smart games blogging. In answer to your question, I usually see Lumines when I close my eyes - does that count?

David Herbert presents Games-News-Minneapolis Kills Illegal To Sell Video Games To Minors Bill posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-How To Unlock Each Character In Super Smash Bros Brawl! posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-The More You Know: Limited Edition posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Reviews-Enigma The Series:Episode 1 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Mario Kart Wii Opening Cinematic posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Sonic Unleashed Leaked Video? posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Prey 2 For The PS3 Rumour Squashed posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Game-Videos-Resident Evil 5 playable off-screen posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Dead Fantasy II posted at pariahs-guild.com.

Sockpuppetking presents Saints Row 2 posted at Next Gen Gaming Talk. Did you know that sockpuppetking’s real name is actually Herbert David? Strange coincidence.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Map Of The Week-Floozone V2 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Rock Band For The Wii Announced, But Will Be Stripped Down posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Linger In Shadows: Real-Time Tech Demo posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents April Fools’ Day-2008-Princess Peach Is Pregnant, But Mario Is Not The Father posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Why can’t we be friends? posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Crysis:Outtake Series ? Part 1 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Interviews-Rise To Arms posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Grand Theft Auto IV FINAL Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-It’s Been Good posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-G-Man III: The Finale Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Too Human Developer Diary posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Robin Williams Plays Spore posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Prototype Slideshow posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Ubisoft Buys Tom Clancy Name, And Announces Tom Clancy MMO posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Ubisoft Releases Tom Clancy H.A.W.X Website posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-XBOX Portable Hands On posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-NEW 50 Cent Video Game posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Map Of The Week-Chamber 23 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Banjo-Threeie posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Fan Made Diablo 3 Debut Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Quake 3 on iPod Touch posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Interviews-Nuclear Dawn posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-NEW Sonic Unleashed: WEREHOG TEASER posted at pariahs-guild.com.

Astrobird presents How to Download, Play and Purchase a PopCap Game posted at Dive into Games, saying, “We offer reviews and information for new casual gamers, as well as gaming gift suggestions.” A fantastic entry from AstroBird telling you how to get into the wonderful world of PopCap Games. Incidentally, PopCap Games started after an image of David Herbert appeared in the founder’s bacon sandwich.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Red Vs. Blue Reconstruction Trailer posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-OMG-Final Fantasy 12 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-Smash Bros. Lyrics Interpretation posted at pariahs-guild.com.

old-wizard presents Top 20 Worst Video Games of All Time posted at old-wizard.com. I don’t know what my top twenty would be, but here’s a few ideas:

• Special David Herbert Investigation
• Double Dragon vs. David Herbert
• David Herbert’s Dark Castle

David Herbert presents Games-News-Epic Games Revealed “Make Something Unreal” Contest posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Rock Band Mushroom Drum Pads posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Mario Kart Wii Wifi Online Match posted at pariahs-guild.com.

old-wizard presents Top 10 Video Game Heroes of All Time posted at old-wizard.com. Guess who my number one would be.

David Herbert presents Modding Warehouse-Map Of The Week-Castle 3 posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-WWE Smackdown Vs Raw 2009 HD Tag Team Demonstration posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Battlefield: Bad Company - Redford posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Gaming Machinima-Videos-The Device Has Been Modified posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Mario Kart Wheel Demonstration posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Star Wars: Force Unleashed:Vader Announcement posted at pariahs-guild.com.

CraftedKarma presents How to rip flash games to your hard drive posted at Urban Survival Skills. Useful if you need a break from reading about David Herbert. If you do, you’re stupid.

David Herbert presents Games-News-Stephen King Defends Violent Video Games posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Rufus in SF4 New Character posted at pariahs-guild.com.

Alexander presents Yet another attempt to get video games censored posted at Extremely Lame, saying, “Election time? Check. Legislators a bit down in the polls? Check. It’s time for another instalment of “Let’s blame pop culture for all of society’s ills and cash some quick percentage points!”” I can’t wait until the next British General Election. I’ll make a stand by adding an extra candidate to my ballot sheet. Any suggestions?

David Herbert presents Games-News-Walter Reed Army Medical Center Uses Wiis For Therapy posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-GTA 4 Liberty City Gun Club posted at pariahs-guild.com.

David Herbert presents Games-Videos-Blue Falcon Unlocked-Mario Kart Wii posted at pariahs-guild.com.

Well, that’s the end of this month’s Carnival of David Herbert Bloggers! I do hope you’ve enjoyed yourselves, and make sure to stop by next month to celebrate everybody’s favourite Lord of Dogs, Mr David Herbert. Make sure you read all of his posts and leave at least one comment each. Oh, and David - maybe just choose your best bits next time?

Don’t forget to use our Blog Carnival Submissions Form, and also you can see all our past editions on the blog carnival index page. Cheers, and see you soon!

VITAL STATISTICS:

Total number of submissions: 76.
Submissions from David Herbert: 64.
Number of times the words “David Herbert” used in this article: 74.
Spelling mistakes: 4: “Clany”, “Cancy”, “freind”, “installment”.

Technorati tags: carnival of video game bloggers, blog carnival.

Note well, Carnival fans: Some posts submitted before the deadline have been held back for next month’s because I’ve been having a little jaunt around the country. It’s complicated but rest assured, they will feature in next month’s Carnival, I promise. Now, let’s eat!

Hors d’oeuvres

When faced with a huge banquet, it’s best to start with tiny titbits to get your tastebuds warmed up. Alan Smithee’s “Phantasy Star Generation 1 & 2: Sega really needs to do this… now!” is the perfect start! I’ll admit to being a bit of a neophile when it comes to Phantasy Star, but this certainly is appetising!

A new twist on a traditional starter now: Horny Melon. Normally you’d eat honeydew or galia melon, but here at the Carnival we’ve found a new variety, called “Top Ten Most Anticipated Titles of 2008“. It does come with a warning, though: “This is by no means a comprehensive list, instead showcasing those titles that bring something new to the table or at the very least resurrect a long dead IP.”

A little old-wizard is called for next, I think… ah, that “Top 10 MegaMan bosses” should hit the spot! True fact: I’ve never played a MegaMan game. Those boss names are enticing, though! In fact, they perfectly complement his main course, the “Top 10 Gaming Consoles of All Time“. There’s always some controversy over what ingredients should actually make up a “top 10 consoles” list, but here’s an old Newton family recipe: 5g Sony, 10g Atari, 25g Nintendo, 14kg Sega. Pinch of Microsoft.

Matt Howard’s next up with an old family recipe for video game satire, perfected in his showpiece “Bush and Advisors Play Team Fortress 2, Iraq War Called Off“. Flavoured to perfection Matt - nice and sour!

Every great chef knows presentation is everything, and a visually pleasing dish always tastes better than a sloppy mess. With that in mind, Game Fan Art presents “Game Fan Art: The Legend of Zelda“, and Robyn J. McCleary shows off “ORIGINAL NINTENDO” from the kitchens of THE BEAUTY OF ART TODAY. Strangely, I’ve noticed most of my cooking tastes better with my glasses off.

Joe Boomer knows how to please his patrons, but I can’t say any more until the court case ends. He can also defend himself, as his knowledge of superb fighting game “Toribash” shows. I’ve lost many an hour to Toribash, so if you haven’t tasted its delights yet be sure to whet your appetite on Joe’s piece. You won’t be the first.

Not all fine dining has to be expensive, you know. I went to a tremendous restaurant last week that was also very reasonably priced. Majid Morabit appreciates thrift, so his dish consists of “All PS3 games for 34.99CDN!“. Carnival reminder: service is not included in the bill. 

Renowned chef Norman Morse can never be accused of serving small portions, and the cornerstone of his new menu, “Why can’t I learn Chinese in a computer game? The Game of Self: Ideas from the perspective of a computer game developer who has immersed himself in Chinese Culture, Self Development and NLP.“, is certainly a mouthful!

Phew, I’d better take a break or it’s possible I’ll die of indigestion. Now’s a good time to mop my brow, loosen my belt and remind you that the next edition of the Carnival should be fully cooked from frozen on April the 21st, and if you fancy hosting it in your own kitchen please leave a comment or email me!

I’m launching into the remaining dishes with renewed energy, and taking a huge bite from Holly Ord’s “Sexy Girls Play the Wii and You Should Too!” from their restaurant, Menstrual Poetry. Haven’t seen that one mentioned in the Good Food Guide… great name, though.

Justin Young came third in Junior Masterchef at the age of just four, and that natural ability comes through in the menu at his bar and grill Game With a Brain, where today the special is a lip-licking “Five useless lessons taught by video games“. The only lesson I’ve learnt recently is that lining up squares of the same colour makes them disappear. And that this feels good when repeated for hours.

A delightful spread from Neelakantha now, offering a massive 100 different flavours on a plate! “The Wii Owner’s Toolbox: 100 Cool Things to do With Your System” should satisfy you… until Mario Kart Wii is out at least!

Today’s Specials

What is a great main course without the side dishes to complement it? What is fish and chips without salt and vinegar? What is roast beef without gravy? What is Andrew Pellerano without “Portal Guns are a Game Condiment“? I can’t answer that, but his blog YAY! It’s Andrew! has the second best name I’ve encountered this month.

Over at the head table I can just see Andy Boyd’s head bobbing around, checking out the reactions to everybody else’s dishes. It’s fair to say they’re going down extremely well, but he has with him a six-foot surprise hidden beneath a cloth. With a flourish he proudly unveils his “9 Home Gaming Setups Better Than Yours”, with a booming cry of “some great setups in here including some serious home gaming arcades!” Looks like Phil from Sodaware just threw up a little…

It’s a cliché, but less sometimes really is more, and Andrew Zolman’s minimalist approach speaks volumes without saying much at all, really. When you see “Webblog.com” posted at game raiderz, I’m sure you’ll agree his dishes speak for themselves.

Someone else who speaks for himself is… well, me. You can chow down on two slices of James Newton goodness, the first of which is my Wii Fit preview from Nintendo Life. After building some muscle, don’t forget your grey matter by checking out my recent article “Dr Kawashima’s Brain Washing: How Nintendo Dumbed Gaming Down“. It might seem anti-Nintendo, but the truth is it was borne out of frustration from listening to their Sight Training and Brain Training adverts all day long at work.

Why not wash that down with a little vintage Sega goodness? We’ve a delightful bottle of Sega Superstars Tennis on our wine list today; a jaunty bouquet with notes of nostalgia and Richard Jacques’s aftershave slipping through. A tremendous accompaniment to our banquet!

Everyone has a favourite chef: mine is myself. That said, Alvaro Fernandez always cooks up a sumptuous plateful, and he’s delivered again this month with a succulent report on The State of the Brain Fitness Software Market 2008, proving there is much more to tightening up your intellectual agility than counting men going into houses.

James D. Brausch just popped into the banquet, handing out flyers for his post “Is Your Keyboard Making You Fat?“. From the looks on the other guests’ faces, they’ve had enough just for now, but I need fattening up, so more for me!

You know when you’re young and you want to avoid eating something horrible, so you push it around your plate and hope it thins out enough to look like you’ve eaten it? Well this isn’t anything like that. All these articles are haute cuisine of the highest order, and none more so than “The Road to Hell is Gamed with Good Intentions: Mass Effect“, Jen’s insightful take on the recent kerfuffle over Mass Effect’s sex scene.

Next I’ll carve a slice of K Peney’s meaty-looking “Stepping Away from Escapism” from Write the Game. Tender, moist… delicious! More of this, please!

Jigsaw HC barbecues a mean steak, but will he find EA’s Army of Two a little undercooked? His Army of Two Review should satisfy.

I tried sushi for the first time a few weeks ago. I love rice, soy sauce and fish. I hated sushi. If you’re thinking of trying an unfamiliar form of dining called “Macs”, you should check out Jose DeJesus MD’s “Tips for People Considering a Mac or Macbook“. It could prevent you spitting your cold, salty rice all over yourself.

Well, after all that fine dining it’s only right to finish on something decadently indulgent, and right on cue is dessert master David Herbert of the Michelin-starred Pariah’s Guild, with a calorie-stuffed twenty articles at the time of writing! As is tradition, David earns The Jordan Bieber Award for Most Articles Submitted! Many congratulations and thanks David, I hope you’ll continue to support the Carnival in the coming months!

Videos:

The Bourne Conspiracy: Gameplay trailer with commentary
Circuits in Mario Kart Wii
Street Fighter IV: Chun Li vs. C. Viper
GTA 4 - LCPD Trailer
Leaked Prince of Persia 4 Video
WOW Music Video
Alone In The Dark: Epic Haunting Gameplay Trailer
ButtKicking Device
Iron Man: Iron Flight gameplay
Project Origin - Second Trailer

Gaming Machinima reviews

The Man Who Wanted to Sneeze
One Last Breath
Jay Adams
Mallet
Pimp Saga Episode 3: Revenge

News:

Dexter Game Is In The Works
Pirates Of The Caribbean Director Is Entering The Video Game Market
More Details About Sin City; The Game

Everything else:

OMG-Garry’s Mod 10
Modding Warehouse-Map Of The Week-Station 1

Many thanks again to David and everybody who submitted articles this month! As usual, a few didn’t make the cut but don’t let that deter you from submitting again next time!

I’m stuffed

The next Carnival is coming around on April the 21st, so get those articles in before April the 18th to be considered! Submit your entry using the Blog Carnival submissions form. If you’d be interested in hosting next month’s or a future edition of the Carnival, please leave your name and website in a comment and we’ll strike a deal!